I had my bone marrow biospy and my onc. had my butt and hips so numb I only felt a pain once for about 5 seconds so I did it and he was wonderful......but was in awful pain for like 2 days and very sore for about a week. The results showed those bad chromosomes are GONE and also still PCRU!!!! My hemoglobin was 11 so he said we had to keep a eye on that but not to be concerned yet. Just have to deal with the damn side effects...fatigue..aches and pains and my lovely migraines have returned plus menopause. And this damn anxiety they call it....you would think it would go away with everything going good but it won't. It's like I have no control on it.....I don't shake all the time just a tight, tense feeling inside. They have me on xanax and added Buspar but I don't think the Buspar is doing anything except making me sleepy...anyone ever took Buspar? I take Elavil at bedtime and on drugs.com Elavil and Buspar have major interaction, I don't take the Buspar till 9am but could it be making me worse cause at times I feel as if it does. I don't go back to the psychriatrist till middle of Dec. and he put me on it. If I take a oxycodone for pain or headache I can do alot more cause it relaxes my body but doesn't knock me out..low dose 5mgs. Am I just going to be a crazy person with the anxiety (?) for the rest of my life and have to take meds? The bio-feedback didn't work....I tried that years ago for my migraines too. I am allowed to take xanax as needed but I won't go past 4mgs a day...I refuse to take anymore...trying to cut back but I get the withdrawel feelings so I know my body is dependent on them now...been on for like a year so i feel like a drug addict and need to go to a rehab or something.
I made the decision that I may have cancer but it's not going to take me over..have to much I want to do yet. I have grand kids i want to see grow up...I might be a little slower than before and have to rest more often but it's not taking my life over!!!! I am going to try as hard as I can not to think about it but the side effects are there to remind me but going to try to push myself more. I was always a Black Friday shopper and could go for hours...well I am going this year but don't know how long I will last. Plus I don't have any patience any more so I might get frustrated standing in line....didn't use to bother me..any one else notice this since diagnosis or is it just me? Maybe menopause too? I am having a grandma sleepover with my oldest grand daughter and 5 of her friends.....my daughter in law is staying too....so i may end up in the looney bin but trying to do more with each of the kids in their own way. My 16 yr old son is in 11th grade band and just got a award for playing his drum at a competition that i went to and never went last year cause it was cold and I had to drive there but I did it and so proud of him. He got his first 2 letters from local collages wanting him in the mail yesterday. He wants to draft and build houses and buildings and I am so proud and I want to be around to see all this so I just hope this damn awful brown pill (Gleevec) keeps me here to see this and my grand kids grow up too.
Enough of my rambling but it helps to get it out.